Category Archives: animation

INVADER ZIM Fact #28

FYOO-CHAAH BAYBEHHH! COMIN' TO GET YEWWWWW!

I want to talk about yesterday, okay?

Yesterday’s post was very obviously hurt by my having to deal with a few unexpected hurdles, and those hurdles took precedent over what has, thus far, been my sole reason for existing: my selfless mission to help you understand what it is to be human, to be a sentient being whose awareness is not clouded by lies, and to just stuff your head with the truth the way a sausage-lord crams filling into a sausage casing.

You are my sausage casings, and my fistfuls of truth-stuffings are at the ready.  I’m a lot better at this than when I first started out, so I no longer literally have the metal tubs sloshing around with stuffings that I have screamed truths into.  I’m not even sure why I thought that would work!  Hah!  Those poor first few test subjects!  Ah, education.

As a result of my generally relentless dedication to the cause, a glaring lapse in attention as demonstrated by yesterday’s anemic post stands out more than it would if I went with my usual instincts, and shat out a crappy post day after day instead of blinding you with brilliance as I so regularly do.
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INVADER ZIM Fact #27

Really no  time for a post at all today.  Some weird shit going down with this guy and the Rikki interview tape.  A lot of trouble I’m going through, just to give you guys something that sounds boring as hell by the descriptions of it.  Still, I have to drive out to the middle of nowhere to get the tape in person, because the guy apparently has never heard of copying and uploading stuff.

So, yeah, I’m on my way out of here in just a sec, but I have just enough time to maybe drop a wee fact on you for today.

WEE FACT:

Frank Conniff did not like what I revealed about his abilities and is now pounding on my door.  He has possessed the body of a grizzly bear and is trying to get into my house.  I have shot him ten times and all that does is make him angrier.

I am so sorry for everything I have ever done.

Oh, god…oh god the wall is coming down!

I have

INVADER ZIM Fact #26

You might think, based on a lot of what I’ve detailed here in these posts over the past ten years, that working on my INVADER ZIM show was pretty fraught with peril and sinister dealings.  I can see how you could come to that conclusion after reading about the fury of Frank Conniff, disintegrating cheese-babies, and rapacious ghosts.  I can’t stress enough that these things were just a matter-of-fact way of life while working on the production and were, good or bad, what colored our lives and times back then.

When I strap myself into my writing engine each night, naked and greased up, preparing these posts for uploading the following morning, I don’t go into it thinking this one will be a happy one, this one will be a sad one, this one will be an angry one.  The process is nothing of the sort.  It’s just a matter of what comes to mind at that moment, spurred on by the current surging through me from the bolts pressed against my temples, held tight by the helmet and strap.

Whether the fact I’m sharing during that session has positive or negative connotations is the furthest thing from my mind when the neighbors are pounding on the door telling me to stop screaming and to stop it with the crackling and thundering.
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INVADER ZIM Fact #25

Fun for ALL, not just people with bad dye-jobs and terrible skin.

I know I destroyed The Ring in the last post, but I maybe should’ve held off on that because it’s not like there aren’t still several more days of the month left.  Now we just have to awkwardly sit around and pass the time until we can resume our regular operations, free from this hellish burden.

Remember a few days ago when I mentioned trying to track down something special for the final installment of these posts, a rarely seen interview with voice actor Rikki Simons?  Well, I’m still waiting to hear from the guy that said he saw bits of it to let me know if he can send me any information on it.  I’ve not seen the thing myself, but I guess it was to be included in a documentary about people’s favorite old cartoons and the personalities behind them.  I’d be all about showing more than just Rikki, not that that isn’t enough, but the thing never got completed from what I hear, and all that’s left is bits and pieces of footage, unedited and mostly unwatchable.

Not holding my breath on that, though, as even Rikki himself doesn’t remember doing the interview and it doesn’t sound like what’s there is all that interesting in anything other than for the curiosity factor.

So these last couple of days are going to be like finishing a race when the top slots have already been won and the people still hanging around near the finish line are the ones cleaning up the cups and detritus left behind by the people who are now already home or sitting in their nicely heated cars.
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INVADER ZIM Fact #24

Thanks. My dogs were really barking, maaaan.

This is the point in our journey where I collapse, the weight of this burden I have taken upon myself getting the best of me and bringing me down.  From where I lie, the jagged rocks of this cruelly formed mountain cutting into my back, I look up and see only poisonous darkness, black clouds belched up from the final point of my destination, the place that I meant to finish off in.

But I cannot go on.  My legs won’t take me, my will won’t rouse me.

This is where you, chubby and always filled with hope take me up in your fat, fat arms and carry me the rest of the way because you know, you know that this journey was for a good reason, and the only reason that matters.

The music swells here, and though people may giggle at the overwrought vibe of it all, you could not care less what they think, because without you, without us doing what we’re doing, their smarmy-ass faces would be toast in short enough time.
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