Tag Archives: Twittin’s

Twitter Weekly Updates for 2009-02-27

  • Saw a sign claiming a bakery’s goods were all made “with love”. I have no love, so I cleaned out the store, a brilliant plan forming. #
  • One last look back and I saw the baker-lady, her face hanging slack and haunted from looking directly into my terrible, empty eyes. #
  • Eager, I collapse in the street,, devouring muffins and banana breads and all manner of love-cakes. This time it WILL work. #
  • @3liza ‘The Lovecakes Application’ is my band’s name. in reply to 3liza #
  • Ever suffered like G did? I have, and it’s not cool, kids. Not cool at all. #
  • The little flying demon warned me, but it’s advice seemed to have no effect, thus my suffering in G-like ways. #
  • Concerned with how often a “mature” label in gaming or animation simply means giant tits and saying “FUCK” beyond reason. Howzat mature? #
  • HotD: Overkill, while fun to play, is not nearly as funny with it’s constant fucks as the squeaky clean bizarre dialogue of part 2. #
  • It’s tough enough trying pitch animation that ISN’T for kids without justifying it as being obsessed with fucking and cussing. #
  • And then, when you tell them it’s about cussing at children while fucking them, they’re even less receptive. What do these people want?! #
  • @warrenellis I hope you’re not saying that sarcastically. I really feel I’ve got a hit on my hands with this. in reply to warrenellis #
  • Behold, lil’ nukies, @cunch has an etsy store. You probably don’t deserve it, but there it is. Wipe your feet, you slobs http://is.gd/kuWe #
  • @zoetica I can be a filthy namedropper as well, lady. I was once at a KFC in line behind a guy I recognized from a Fritos commercial. in reply to zoetica #
  • No day ever hits rock bottom when you have the Ghosts n’ Goblins theme running through your head. You do go a bit mad though. #
  • Inexplicably, however, the Bubsy 3D theme pretty much guarantees you a terrifying and interminable attack from a rapacious sea lion. #
  • @3liza Yeah, I’m a veritable mountain of thrown panties after I squeak out my heavy metal rendition ‘One Winged Angel’. in reply to 3liza #
  • @rikkisimons It’s why I don’t hang out near you when you’re eating. I lose so much stuff when I’m on the event horizon of your meals. in reply to rikkisimons #
  • House of the Dead: Overkill makes me wish, like I always do, that the Wii was a peripheral for a more capable system. Fun, but so jerky. #
  • A particularly favorite touch is the lil American flag that waves when you execute a ‘goregasm’ killing spree. #
  • Rest easy, guys. GIRL has reached the moon thank to your diligent stretching. Next stop: MARS. #
  • These horrible days, every place I walk into has a piano player that suddenly stops playing with a discordant sting. Even my bathroom. #
  • To stay warm during a blizzard recently, I cut open an ox and crawled into his corpse, and yes…piano player in there stopped playing. #
  • I still think my idea for a marshmallow peeps cereal could be huge. It’s not cereal shaped peeps, either. Just actual peeps in milk. #
  • Getting past the obvious slogan “Turns your milk Peepy” might be tricky, but it might actually be in aid of the grotesque charm. #
  • Should Peeps Cereal take off it’d make it easier to get my ‘Bacon Wrapped Weenie’ Cereal on store shelves as well. Packed with vitamin W! #
  • Vitamin WEE, that is. #
  • I’m not kidding at all when I say that this song is just begging for a Tom Waits cover or at least a duet. http://tinyurl.com/zz5cz #
  • Something along the lines of ‘Filipino Box Spring Hog’, but with some hideous beats dropped on. #
  • Hopefully you guys tag the Mindspill RSS as I don’t always link to posts from this Twitter. Mostly out of shame. http://tinyurl.com/ac5cun #
  • @rstevens Following him, yeah, but envying your doing so from anywhere but here. in reply to rstevens #
  • Failed utterly at going to bed. Quite literally. Aimed for the mattress and flew hard into the ceiling instead. Gonna just stay up now. #
  • I’m at that stage of staying up where you think you’re speaking at a normal volume but are, in fact, defecating on every one in the room. #
  • Now at that stage of staying up where, regardless of the type of cereal you pour into the bowl, there are always booberries in it. #
  • @3liza He Truly has captured your floating, and the fiery belch that so distinctly whispers “Eliza”. in reply to 3liza #
  • To master the last trick in the video do you NEED a lounging vagrant handy? It just seems so specific. http://tinyurl.com/d52fbe #
  • Spoke to a development guy at THQ and actually ENJOYED it. Didn’t even exit dramatically through the window like I often do at these things #
  • Don’t get excited, guys. I was just re-stocking their snack machines. This goddamn economy… #
  • Not sure if I should weirded out or immensely thankful that only around six people out of thousands reply when I write things here. #
  • Suckers. This tweet/tracer app will now allow me to sniff out your minds and bump you all off. 6 corpses just wasn’t going to be enough. #
  • Most of you deserve it for being heatheny enough to think my icon is Adolf Hitler. #
  • Clearly there is a hard split between the older, grizzled folks in the Chapliny know and the wee ones still in their pre-Chaplin-aware stage #
  • An arena shall be rented, weapons distributed amongst the tribes, and cameras set up that I may sell the footage. This damn economy, man… #
  • @enicolle now you know how Wolverine or Freddy Kreuger feel. Also Vega…and Predator, too. You see where I’m going with this. in reply to enicolle #
  • @meathelix Hey, thanks, maaan. Most game company dealings I have end in mysterious, dead silences, so stocking snack machines is progress. in reply to meathelix #
  • Gravity on the Helghast homeworl adversely affects the motor skills of the human attackers to where they control like prize game claw-arms. #

Twitter Weekly Updates for 2009-02-20

  • @cunch Not the taxi, no. It’s that box guy with the eyeballs blasting from out of his head. in reply to cunch #
  • @cunch I’ll likely show the world the results, but I’ll take none of the responsibility for the effects of doing such a thing. It’s bad. in reply to cunch #
  • I’m a romantic at heart, so despite it just being a machine, for Valentine’s Day, I’m making dinner for the fuckbot I made out of scrap. #
  • @enicolle I assuage the Fuckbot’s fears about being made a whore simply by pointing over to Whorebot. Whorebot’s just filthy. in reply to enicolle #
  • New post? I got yer new post right heah!: http://tinyurl.com/c5f3nz #
  • Being reminded why I normally keep comments closed on my various posts. Ignorance is bliss, folks. #
  • Because I’m a masochist, I read over other artist friends’ comment sections, marveling at how few uses of the word “doom” there are. #
  • I dig people liking my work and all, but you go around talking like you “think” I or my characters do and someone’s bound to smack you. #
  • Sometimes, looking over the response I get, I feel like King Theoden in that suiting up scene asking “How did it come to this?” #
  • I, at least, don’t get crushed by a silly monster only to have my daughter avenge me only to deliver a shitty one-liner. #
  • The sheer amount of responses that are using the word “doom” in an ironic sense is staggering. Well done, people. The exit is over there! #
  • Ah, well. Comments are now closed on the ol House of Pies post. I really did like that last Lord of the Rings, though. #
  • @3liza But…I like apes. You, however, have read my emails. I never should have done that to you. Changed you forever. in reply to 3liza #
  • Favorite two words from an earlier conversation: “Black lactation”. Would be a fine metal band name #
  • Watching non-gamers play Flower, gyrating their arms, stress levels skyrocketing as they struggle to fly relaxedly through dream-fields. #
  • @psychomar I left only your post as a sort of head on a stick to ward off possible enemies, man. in reply to psychomar #
  • @warrenellis Feelin’ a bit ‘Father Jack-y” this day, eh? Careful you don’t get the hairy hands. in reply to warrenellis #
  • @cunch Flower’s relaxing enough, until you get to the downed power line areas and you’re suddenly on fire from contacting hot, live steel. in reply to cunch #
  • @cunch Weird. I had just gotten through that episode again yesterday as well! Stop trying to BE me, man. I’m up to DNA now. in reply to cunch #
  • @cunch Nope. You were in the level before it. Before the pain. Before the dream dies. in reply to cunch #
  • @deadzebra Oh, god. All the hand-shaking that goes on at those things. People should be happy enough with a polite bow or a nose wrinkle. in reply to deadzebra #
  • Time to find another sketch to finalize. Taking the elevator down to the archives, suited up for any run-ins with sketchbook goblins. #
  • @3liza I’m a terrible teacher, or so I’ve been told. Still, I firmly believe screaming lessons one inch away from a person’s face is cool. in reply to 3liza #
  • Hammering people slavish enough to need twitter updates on their mobiles is one of the wee perks of using this thing. Wake up, sleepies! #
  • Why complain about something you’ve added to your own list of extraneous needs. Isn’t having to eat, sleep, shit and fuck enough? BEEP! #
  • @KarlChristian Be prepared to go through a shit-ton of banjos, man. in reply to KarlChristian #
  • @KarlChristian Probably easier to down shots of whiskey or something rather than choke down banjo after banjo. in reply to KarlChristian #
  • @cunch Excellent. Doing a bit of that m’self. We can battle. in reply to cunch #
  • @NaomiSummers It’d be more laptops with Wacom tablets or Modbooks in hand, and banjo music, today anyhow. in reply to NaomiSummers #
  • Nice to see Galactica get back to some fun science fiction instead of the pre-ordained, vaguely defined spiritualism nonsense. Robots, man. #
  • @NaomiSummers Your use of complete sentences and speaking on topic is bringing a tear to my eye. Bless you, you wonderful tea-Brit. in reply to NaomiSummers #
  • I miss the days of the show having characters celebrating small victories with more than tears, a punch to the face, and moping. #
  • @NaomiSummers talking about Galactica. What’s this Tom and Jerry business? in reply to NaomiSummers #
  • @Wicabeth It’s fine tea, but it’s easily purchased at the nearest grocery! Thanks for turning me onto it, though. in reply to Wicabeth #
  • Though Valetine’s Day has passed, it’s never too late for romance: http://tinyurl.com/cmh4ba #
  • Valetine Day, yeah. Totally different from Valentine’s Day. #
  • Working on a post about next month’s Australian adventure and my appearances at the Melbourne and Brisbane Supanovas. #
  • Could a couple of Australian followers pipe up so I can get a read on whether or not I should hate you or expect some decency? #
  • @starsnostars You’re actually volunteering as an asshole? Why would you do that? in reply to starsnostars #
  • Of the tiny cross-section that’ve replied, it sounds like a decent lot so far. Still, I’m setting up the auto-turret grid defense. #
  • The turrets will be programmed to detect certain types of behavior, acting upon their presence with terrifying speed. Gonna be cool. #
  • Any ideas for what to program the turrets to watch out for? I’m familiar with the American horror feature set, but what about out there? #
  • Wait. There are Hot Topics in Australia, too? Why the hell did nobody warn me? Does it also have…”ANIME”? Fucking hell. #
  • By the sound of it now, I’ll be doubling up on turrets. Been practicing my technique with Savage Moon, Field Runners and Defense Grid. #
  • Just days after charging me $100 bucks to repair my suddenly broken 360 one week out of warranty, MS announces: http://tinyurl.com/bxj4vb #
  • Now I see what I’m doing wrong: http://tinyurl.com/acz7p4 #
  • The mere existence of such a game is awesome and absurd enough: http://is.gd/jWOF #
  • @emmastory Grow, probably, but it’s definitely not as immediately memorable as the last couple of releases. in reply to emmastory #
  • Sketching out costume redesigns for characters I’ve not touched in a good couple of years. Needs more screws. #
  • In answer to the kind and the viciously eager: No, it’s not for new comics. But don’t worry, even if you don’t see it, I’m working, kids. #
  • I guess it’s flattery of sorts to have slobbering crazies curse you for not doing comics as often as they’d like. Means they care! D’aww. #
  • There’s this idea where if you’re not doing it for all the world to watch, then you’re not really doing anything at all. S’funny, that. #
  • @katarr Me in particular? Damn…I’ve always had a solipsistic streak in me but to have it confirmed adds some pressure. in reply to katarr #
  • Can’t feel my fingers. Must be done drawing for the night/morning. Time to celebrate by screaming at the top of my lungs. #
  • As per usual, my screaming has awakened the congratulatory drawing-elves that wait for me to finish up my masterpieces. Lookit’ em dance! #
  • The dance…it grows uglier, more lascivious. I feel I’ve made a terrible mistake in awakening this ancient evil with my incredible work. #
  • You know, your suggestions about the very real elf problem are just ridiculous and, I have to say, fuckin’ STUPID. This is real life, kids. #

Twitter Weekly Updates for 2009-02-13

  • I hit on women with a sketch I did of them bleeding to death, explaining “This is what happens if you don’t come with me.” God, I’m lonely. #
  • @rstevens My Roomba snapped a sweeper bit while choking on Goomba toy that fell on the floor. I hope your Roomba god is out there. in reply to rstevens #
  • Some movies, like Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, should be released simultaneously with their RiffTrax counterpart. So much more watchable #
  • @robertpopper Audio Hijack works for me. http://tinyurl.com/6km4h in reply to robertpopper #
  • Got my tea, my David Attenborough docs in the bg (he’s hassling some birds), and my Final Cut Pro open. No sleep til..well…final cut. #
  • I want you all to channel your hopes and dreams towards my completing the sound editing on this thing today. Also, give me all your money. #
  • The first hopes and dreams are starting to trickle in, and I’m beginning to regret my request. Collectively, they smell of human sewage. #
  • Update: It is human sewage. #
  • @cunch I feed only on dark mater pies, shit out of the infinite void, baked in the heartless vacuum of unfeeling horror. Thanks though. in reply to cunch #
  • @cunch Oh. Did I mention that I only eat dark matter pies made with crusts shat out by ZORGOS OF THE UNDYING NOTHINGNESS? Yeah. in reply to cunch #
  • @cunch Yeah. Why? is that weird? You’re making me paranoid about eating things shat forth from the howling pitch. Stop it. in reply to cunch #
  • No, I was not at the New York Comicon. #
  • Not this year. Not in human form, anyhow. #
  • I’ll tell you what I’m working on so long as it all fits within Twitter’s restrictive single post word-count limits. Okay..here goes. It’s #
  • Ah well. #
  • Still one of my favorite, revoltingly sad boss fights in all of gamedom. You kill him out of disgusted sympathy: http://tinyurl.com/bmhykd #
  • 3:29. Done with Soundtrack file for the night. Hyper as fuck after sitting all day. I’ve launched straight up through the roof into space #
  • I leave Los Angeles in tacky, soulless flames as I explode out and upward, sipping on Genmaicha, munching a biscuit. Faster! Higher! #
  • Monstrous OCD makes me wonder if I locked my door despite the door and everything for miles being obliterated. Fuck it. To the moon! #
  • I am determined to recreate Outrun in real life. No Ferrari, but I painted a stolen Volkswagon Rabbit red with some poster paints. SWEET. #
  • I’m out on a palm tree lined road, so that’s checked off. Now, to find some blond floozie. I see one leaving an El Pollo Loco. I strike! #
  • Blond floozie with a head injury slumped comfortably in passenger seat. Magical Sound Shower on the tape deck and I’m ready to go! #
  • Bothered by the cops coming up behind me. This isn’t Need for Speed: Hot Pursuit. Don’t they understand? Blond is screaming. #
  • First long bend ahead! I start my slide, but slam into a guard rail. Why isn’t my VW Rabbit powersliding cartoonishly? It’s all so wrong. #
  • The blond is ruining the illusion by screaming for help and coughing up blood from her crushed innards. The police are firing at me now. #
  • A correction about a VW from an actual German! Thanks @heyoboy . Now SHUT THE FUCK UP, you pedantic bastard! I’m trying to drive here! #
  • Tried bouncing off a slowpoke on the curve, but lost control. Rabbit is flipping, but not at all whimsically! Oh, god…Oh sweet holy god. #
  • Sliding upside down. I’m alright, but the blond’s head is leaving a crimson streak like she’s suddenly a wet magic marker. Oh, dear god. #
  • I put on my headphones and play Splash Wave, fleeing from the burning wreckage and vapid gore. Gotta ditch the cops. #
  • Home safe, but disturbed by the fact that only one person seems to know what I’m talking about. It’s like that Thinner thing all over again #
  • @cunch Half never left the jar, emitting a worried “boop” and crashing with a dreaded BSOD, diminishing his nefarious philanthropic intent. in reply to cunch #
  • @cunch Tiny screens. in reply to cunch #
  • Could this be my final night working on this thing? I pray to the animal spirit of editing, the Final Cuttlefish Pro, that it is. #
  • One week out of warranty and my 360 has the not quite AS dreaded but still godawful E74, quarter-ring of death. Wonderful. #
  • 11 hours into broken 360. The Wii tries to cheer me up by making cookies, but accidentally gets trapped in the oven. The PS3 just stares. #
  • Wii is recovering in it’s usual place, stuffed under a cabinet. The PS3 has generated a hot apple pie from nothingness to mask the smell. #
  • The Wii, muffled, cries, begging me to play yet another Mario Kart, or something where Mario eats a sandwich part 8. PS3 goes for a smoke. #
  • PS3 comes back in, its cold shark eyes shining. “Want I should cut him?” it says, gesturing with a knife towards the Wii. I think on it. #
  • Even the DS pipes in with “Fuck that voice-chatless gimp!”, taking a tiny/huge crap for emphasis. PSP covers it’s mouth and nose. #
  • The room is silenced by an ancient, phlegmy voice, obviously drunk. “Shut the FUCK up. I’m playing California Games, you CUNTS.” #
  • It’s my Atari Lynx, the original, huge one, rattling around in the box that has been its tomb for ages. #
  • Recalling how much more faithful the Lynx version of Ninja Gaiden was than that NES one, I ask everyone to please just settle down. #
  • @vacant_stare I was a goddamned wizard with the surfing portion. Not so hot at the rest. in reply to vacant_stare #
  • @enicolle That’s one of the systems I never had! I envied my friend’s possession of R-type until I got it for the Master System. in reply to enicolle #
  • Never owned a Neo Geo, Virtual Boy, Wonder Swan, N-Gage, Jaguar, Turbo Express, or Game Gear Either. I DID have a Nomad, though. #
  • Nomad was for the sole purpose of playing Ghouls’ n’ Ghosts, and Sub Terrania on the go for the 5 minutes the batteries lasted. #
  • @enicolle You should have google info on whether or not Abobos live in your neighborhood before moving there. in reply to enicolle #
  • @enicolle Because I left the “ed” off of Googled there, I want you to read that last message in a caveman voice, alright? in reply to enicolle #
  • @enicolle Psst. Just don’t stand on the same 2-dimensional plane as Abobo, man. He won’t be able to hit you! in reply to enicolle #
  • I’m getting better at reaching through the glass of your windows without breaking it. No worries, though. #
  • Not able, yet, to pull anyone back through without their faces smashing the glass to pieces, however, ruining the coolness factor. #
  • Sometimes, when pulling my arm back out, it’s like pulling my arm out of a sleeve, leaving a hollow copy of my arm on the other side. #
  • Copy arms fill up with flesh and bone to immediately hide and act as spies. Not quite a fly on the wall, just about as useful. #
  • Alright, 5000 followers now. Is that enough to change the world yet? No? Goddammit. #
  • Life’s Real Time Strategy, kids. Sorry to say that some of you are cannon fodder for a first assault. A sorta Zerg Rush, if you will. #
  • We’ve enough creep to build upon now, and there’s no sense letting all our forces go to waste. #
  • @michaelk42 I’ll never have that broad, “cat wearing things” appeal. That’s the harsh truth. in reply to michaelk42 #
  • @enicolle Oh…SHIT, Batman. Prepare to know the face of the god of bad awesome. in reply to enicolle #
  • Brainstorming some uniforms for the lot of you. The “zerglings” need not worry about them, as you’ll be so much mulch soon anyhow. #
  • Currently brushing up on the ol’ Illustrator skills by inking a truly terrible hybrid drawing that I did with @cunch #

Twitter Weekly Updates for 2009-02-06

  • I was crying in the tub, like I always do, when my 360 baked me a BLUE velvet cake to cheer me up. It’s not even the elite model. #
  • My 360 left me a pile of last night’s kills at the foot of my bed. #
  • Felt the Wii was feeling neglected, so I took it for a walk. It got its head caught in a bear trap and shit itself. #
  • @emmastory It’s like you’re living in a terribly boring first-person shooter. in reply to emmastory #
  • This is only for my enemies. The rest of you stay away. http://www.poetv.com/video.php?vid=45869 #
  • The Wii tried making me a sandwich and lit itself on fire. I put it out, but it slipped in the water and took out a bunch of dishes. #
  • Tried cheering it up by reminding it how great SMGalaxy was, but it just kept crying, screaming something about Carnival Games. #
  • Throughout all this, my PS3 silently observes, it’s obsidian mass attracting prehistoric apes, filling them with the spark to evolve. #
  • Strapping a zapper collar to hurt me for every improper use of “it’s”. My 360 is kind enough to not correct me. It knows I know. #
  • PS3 having a glass of wine, sitting by the window, lost in its own thoughts, folding genes all the while. The Wii has wet itself. #
  • Whoever is hatching all those tanker bug eggs in Savage Moon, please stop. Just stop already. #
  • I’m getting on in years, and my dream of being a plus-size runway model is getting more and more remote. #
  • Thanks to your kind, supportive words I am now enormous and living my dream. You guys rock and I’m going to eat you. #
  • I’ve eaten through a good deal of you bastards, but more of you keep joining, and I’m starting to get really sick. #
  • I am an abomination of flesh now, moving as a liquid across the land, absorbing all, joylessly. My scrawny frame a distant memory. #
  • I know the minds of each of my victims as they are dissolved, horrified by how many identify way too much with anime characters. Geezus. #
  • Writing up last minute stuff for a meeting in the morning, but R-Type Dimensions is up on Xbox Live. Oh, cruel timing and such. #
  • And no, I’m not back to normal. I now cover the entirety of the Earth, dig? #
  • Hey…forget what I said that one time, yeah? I was drunk on fermented Craisins and needed to take it out on someone with your kinda face. #
  • My dream of getting into video games is held back by that gypsy curse that kills any designers I speak with. #
  • Ran over the gypsy’s daughter while receiving a blow while driving. Later on I replaced Peter Weller as Murphy in the Robocop series. #
  • Although blowjobs in cars seems like the golden years compared to awful robot-ninja and Nancy Allen mushed into body armor. #
  • Still, baking a copy of Carnival Games into a pie and getting someone to eat it hasn’t broken my game designer curse. #
  • @cunch I made 400 accounts and am following you on every single one of them. I’m also staring into your windows. All of them. All. in reply to cunch #

Twitter Weekly Updates for 2009-01-30

  • Though I maintain a casual pace, houses crumble as though being bulldozed when I push through them, easy as a hand through sand. #
  • So far no living casualties, but I’m concerned about that old lady on her Rascal about to intersect with my path. #
  • No time to mourn for the old woman, the woman whose flesh and bone came apart like soggy bologna as I walked through her. I press on. #
  • @cunch That’s my kind of girl, one that painfully vomits out her own landscape. in reply to cunch #
  • You’re pretty much no one if you haven’t watched ‘The Bad Seed’, recently or at all. Hilarious. Also, I can’t stand the shirts you wear. #
  • Noticed a ‘CurseUearthboy’ on the opposing team in Call of Duty 4, recently. Imagining them in a gaudy GIR shirt made murdering them easier #
  • Though 99% of you are strangers to me, I’d just like to say I appreciate those of you with humor enough not to respond like @alliemarie #
  • One wonders how these types actually follow my nonsense to begin with if they don’t understand what it is I do and how. Theories? Anyone?! #
  • This one in particular seems to think I am making those awful clothes myself and making a buck off of them at my awesome garage sales. #
  • I love that image though: Me at my LOOM and sewing machine, angrily making neon garbage that pays my rent somehow. Weeping intermittently. #
  • On a related note: Saw two discarded purple condoms in two completely disparate parts of the city. This means something. #
  • @brendaboo No no. I am always pissing ON them, Brendoo, but not out of spite. It’s a medical condition and you’re cruel to laugh about it. in reply to brendaboo #
  • Everyone follow @cunch. She fucks My Little Ponies. #
  • I’ve learned, the hard way, that life’s problems can’t be solved the way Dig Dug does it. It’s so much more awful and mentally scarring. #
  • Wiped that pump clean of fingerprints, buried it, and walked away to, hopefully, a cleaner solution to my worries. #
  • It is hard, going through all those motions, trying to emulate life without a murder-pump, “reasoning” with people verbally. It’s rough. #
  • Suffering the infinitesimal indignities of vast in their variety and scale of one who goes through life pumpless. How do you all do this?? #
  • suffering an extraneous “of” as well. It’s unbearable. The pump…it calls to me from its grave. #
  • One hand covering my eyes in shame, the other fingering at my weird, smurf-looking costume. Like a telltale heart, the pump calls out. #
  • In a diner, listening to two girls talk about shoes for an hour now. This is it. This is how it ends. I excuse myself to the restroom. #
  • “You gonna do this?” I say to my tired face in the dirty mirror. One minute later, I step out, pump in hand, ready to DIG DUG the joint up #
  • Left and right the people pop. It’s a cartoon massacre, but with very real consequences. “You’re dig’s been DUG.” I say. One guy groans. #
  • I catch my use of “you’re” in the wrong way, but it’s too late, some anal bastard corrects me. They get pumped into oblivion like the rest. #
  • The cops are called, but it’s too late, I vanish underneath it all. SUBTERRANEAN. I wait like charlie under the soil. #
  • They follow into my labyrinth, watching their partners get crushed by stones, and still they follow. I dig deeper, dig? I’m amazing. #
  • Goon Tower, people. Goon Tower. http://tinyurl.com/da4mor #
  • Huh. My 360 is actually playing an internet radio station url from my itunes playlist. Who knew? #
  • Huh. My 360’s sprinkling cheese on my pasta. Where the hell is this in the documentation? #
  • Huhh…My 360’s sharpening a popsicle stick and asking me who my enemies are. #
  • My 360 is sitting on my legs, making sure I don’t hurt myself in case of a seizure. #